Who we are
Our website address is: https://www.blackrockcitysubway.com/
What personal data we collect and why we collect it
When visitors leave comments on the site we collect the data shown in the comments form, and also the visitor’s IP address and browser user agent string to help spam detection.
If you upload images to the website, you should avoid uploading images with embedded location data (EXIF GPS) included. Visitors to the website can download and extract any location data from images on the website.
If you submit something in a form we probably have a copy of it. And whatever form tool we used probably shot a copy off to the NSA, CIA and SPCA.
If you leave a comment on our site you may opt-in to saving your name, email address and website in cookies. These are for your convenience so that you do not have to fill in your details again when you leave another comment. These cookies will last for one year.
If you visit our login page, we will set a temporary cookie to determine if your browser accepts cookies. This cookie contains no personal data and is discarded when you close your browser.
When you log in, we will also set up several cookies to save your login information and your screen display choices. Login cookies last for two days, and screen options cookies last for a year. If you select “Remember Me”, your login will persist for two weeks. If you log out of your account, the login cookies will be removed.
If you edit or publish an article, an additional cookie will be saved in your browser. This cookie includes no personal data and simply indicates the post ID of the article you just edited. It expires after 1 day.
We make every attempt to serve nut free cookies, but with globalization and brokers in the pocket of big nut, we can never be sure.
Embedded content from other websites
Articles on this site may include embedded content (e.g. videos, images, articles, etc.). Embedded content from other websites behaves in the exact same way as if the visitor has visited the other website.
This site makes use of Google Analytics and WordPress Jetpack. For information about the data they collect please check their pages and policies.
Who we share your data with
Ideally, nobody. Potentially, everybody. We have a Facebook presence, so we’ve pretty much given up the fight against evil and now we just nervously smile and wave when we accidentally make eye contact.
How long we retain your data
If you leave a comment, the comment and its metadata are retained indefinitely. This is so we can recognize and approve any follow-up comments automatically instead of holding them in a moderation queue.
For users that register on our website (if any), we also store the personal information they provide in their user profile. All users can see, edit, or delete their personal information at any time (except they cannot change their username). Website administrators can also see and edit that information.
What rights you have over your data
If you have an account on this site, or have left comments, you can request to receive an exported file of the personal data we hold about you, including any data you have provided to us. You can also request that we erase any personal data we hold about you. This does not include any data we are obliged to keep for administrative, legal, or security purposes.
Where we send your data
Visitor comments may be checked through an automated spam detection service.
Your contact information
If you send us your contact information, and ask us to holla back, we probably will. If that’s over email, then your contact info pretty much got sprayed across every switch and router between your mail server and ours. If you want to know what that means, just send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org with the subject “Dear NSA”
You can reach us at email@example.com
How we protect your data
We hired some guy off Fivver to build this site. He only charged us $4.95 and was pretty much understandable despite his Russian accent. He says “Site is very secure. As secure as 311 Rubles can buy.”
What data breach procedures we have in place
In the event of a breach, we will:
- Notify anyone who was crazy enough to give us their contact info.
- Snapshot the server and do a full forensic analysis.
- Hire Liam Neeson, with his particular set of skills, to hunt down and deal with the intruder.
What third parties we receive data from
None. Nobody tells us shit. We get some pretty graphs from Google Analytics, but they keep all the details to themselves.
What automated decision making and/or profiling we do with user data
None. We are pretty good at determining whether someone is an arsehole from the avatar graphic they use. We don’t need no stinking AI for that.
Industry regulatory disclosure requirements
We are required to inform you that breeding conditions at our Utah sandworm breeding facility were the subject of a 60 Minutes expose. If any court cases result from that, records from this site might be subpoenaed.